I’m a few months shy of hitting a year since running this little experiment. I had no idea how much it would frame my outlook on life. It’s something I think about weekly. I am prompted to write about it after a think tank session where a friend of mine, in her own way, came to the same conclusion about it. I did have to laugh. I’ve also been contemplating how forgetful we are, so when she relayed her experience, it was clear she had forgotten that I had said the same thing 9 months ago. Using the words of another friend, I wanted to experience her authentic realization, so I let it be.

As a child, I saw traveling and writing as the ideal romantic life. Have you ever seen Romance in the Stone? I was probably too young to watch it, but wow, how tantalizing was adventure. Not real life. The closest a person could get is to meet a lover or spouse in a random city; maybe they are traveling for work, and you meet up with them for one night to make love and enjoy each other’s company.

But that is not a quick way to find romance in your life. I wrote a list, which was one of my earliest blog posts. Some things were novel, like taking tango lessons (I couldn’t find any near me, so I settled for belly dancing lessons, which I’m still doing) or buying a new dress. Others were taking things I already did and making them special, like making a warm drink and taking the time to savor it or having dinner by candlelight.

I learned that there are threads of every emotion all around you at all times. Which one are you going to choose to weave with? I could see them all there, and I got to choose the meaning I assigned to that moment. It is not a case of ignoring how I feel. It’s more of an “and.” You can feel sad and be grateful to enjoy the whole human experience. Every morning, after working out, I make a hot cup of coffee, honey, and heavy cream and watch the sunrise on my porch. It’s truly a magical time. I’m present in the moment, enveloped with gratitude.

This is a practice of awareness and intention. I’ve continued this practice throughout my life by choosing things I’m already doing and bringing more intention to them. I’ve been practicing morning pages for the past year. I fell in love with writing, so I purchased a few fountain pens and started writing letters, creating a special experience. Instead of just existing through life, I’m intentionally crafting meaning.